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But here’s what gets me steamed—half these places, total rip-offs! You pay 80 bucks, expectin’ magic fingers, and it’s just some bored dude pokin’ your back like, “Eh, good enough.” I’m yellin’ in my head, “Gimme the quaaludes-level treatment, pal!” And don’t get me started on the “happy ending” rumors—makes me neurotic, I’m sittin’ there, paranoid, “Is this legal? Am I on a list now?” Pretty, pretty good way to ruin a buzz.